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Tuesday, November 20, 2012

She is Found

MIL was found however, drug down. She can't hardly speak and she mumbles most of her words. The center told us that she doesn't know how to do anything for herself. Well!..no kidding. If you are drug down, what else can you do but sit there.

FIL is stress because he cannot find out when will she be able to get of that place. And if there is any drug to keep her calm but not like a over cook vegetables. The place gave him a rough amount on how much it will cost to put her in a senior home with Alzheimer, and FIL got more stress.

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Saturday, November 17, 2012

Missing MIL

Yes, you read it right. Like I mentioned in my last post, they went home Tuesday morning. She lasted alright that day. I brought my children to their bio-magnetism appointment on Thursday and the doctors' office is only ten minutes from their house. I called up FIL and asked if they are up for some company and he was more glad to see us.

We met up at a fast food restaurant and MIL was cheery and glad also for seeing them. FIL and I went up to the counter and order some food for the children. He mentioned that MIL act-up on Wednesday, one day after they came home. He said, she went for a walk outside on their 25 acres wood and came back to the house asking who he was and why is he in her house.

To make the story short, he end up calling the police because she was hysterical and wants FIL to get out of the house. He said, the neighbors got drag in too, maybe because MIL ran there for help. I did not ask to elaborate. I know that the situation is already too much for him. She end up staying in the hospital overnight and FIL picked her up the next day.

Well, around four pm the next day, the same day when the children and I visited them, she acted-up again. FIL did the same thing, however this one was different. Friday morning when FIL wanted to pick her up, the hospital did not say where she was and refuses to speak to FIL. However, I bet they gave him the bill from the night before. If the hospital did that to me I will let them sit on that stupid bill. Telling them off. Hey! "I want my wife, since you cannot tell me anything, that is not my bill." "No wife, NO bill, NO payment!" Yes, as far as I know the STATE kidnap my MIL and drug her up to move somewhere else.

She have Alzheimer and can never decide for herself. They took her without authorization from FIL and herself. They will be getting a summon from us. FIL thinks they sent her to the looney bin somewhere in the area. However, he called-up the place and they refuses to speak to him too. I can smell a really nice lawsuit for both of these places. DH is more knowledgeable now than before about the system and oh boy, they don't want to mess with him. They will feel his furry.

I feel so bad for my FIL. He sounded very worry over the phone. I hope he feel a little better today after a night of sleep, if he ever sleeps. Geez, DH and I should never let them go home. We are somewhat responsible for not insisting enough.


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Tuesday, November 13, 2012

And the Name Calling Began

Well, what a lovely morning. DH told me that he told his mother the rundown of her family, and she got it for that moment. Then she told DH, that the man with her in the bedroom is gay. That’s was then when I saw DH downstairs and telling me all about his morning. He said when he heard about it, he change the subject and ask his mother if she wanted to watch TV. He said he doesn’t want to know why she said that.

What goes into DH head was, his mother was trying some kind of sexual move and his father has nothing to do with her. Yea, a sons mind about his parents’ sexual life.

Anyway, when his father woke up he sat down with us on the table while drinking coffee. Conversations with his mother got foggier. She does not recognize the man sitting in front of her is her husband. And every time the conversation comes to his father, her mother will say, “shhh,” let’s not talk about that. It sounded like she doesn’t want her talking about her husband in front this strange man. I think in her mind her husband died and she is with a new man. And this new man doesn’t want to hear about her dead husband. Ah-ya-yay!

DH went to work and they started packing their car. The power at their house is back and being a nice FIL, he wants to gt out of our house right away. She went outside once and brought two bags. When she got back she made a comment that she haven't seen her husband and she thinks he is already dead. I pointed to her husband and said right there, that is Jr. your husband. FIL nod and said right here is your husband, raising his hand. She answered with a question, are you sure? I know what my husband look like. And what is your husband look like, I asked. She said, like Jr. Then I pointed at her husband again.

Then FIL said, STOP and I stop acknowledging what she was saying. I felt so bad for my FIL. He went to the bathroom and I told MIL what do you want me to say. She said, tell me the truth. Well, maybe the truth in her mind, not in everyone's mind. I told her I'm done talking and do not ask me again if you don't believe me and I left the room.

I can't believe it. She called me a liar. Not the exact word but just the same. I cannot imagine Alzheimer sufferer can be so cruel. I like the movie the "50 First Dates" better than what we are going through with my MIL.

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Monday, November 12, 2012

Oh My!

I don't even remember if I was inside the house yesterday when FIL called out that they (his wife) are going to the emergency room. Children told me that I was in the shower when he said goodbye. I did not find out until my Alzheimer MIL told DH (her son but she never acknowledge it) that she choked over bacon and egg while eating in their bedroom yesterday.

They went out to eat brunch with SIL. I was surprised that they got back too fast and she brought her food with her. I was so tired and took a nap when they got home. Almost asleep I heard FIL and MIL arguing about grocery store ads. FIL asking if she have a Giant ad, she came back with, "what you need it for?" FIL said, "I wanted to see it." It turns out she don't even have one. Then I think I snooze off.

I was awaken by my two children arguing about monopoly trades they made. DD wants to take it back and his younger brother kept on insisting no. Well, the game stopped there because DD don't want to take her turn and everyone quit at that point.

Then I went outside to cook dried squids over hot oil. I decided not to cook any of them inside my house anymore and since it was a nice day yesterday. I did not came back in until I was done. I should them to DD and she wasn't mad about the game anymore and asked me for some. FIL and MIL wasn't sitting on the table anymore, I thought they moved to their bedroom. Then I proceeded to take a shower. I still don't know if my in laws are home or not at this point.

Showered done and I ate some pieces of the squid. Children wanted to go out so I got ready to go outside. I noticed that my FIL car is not park on the street. I asked the children and DD told me they left, I ask what for but she didn't know.

Well, the children played outside and I started collecting sticks from the storm we got a few weeks back (Sandy). They asked me if we can light it up again like what we did on Sunday afternoon. We watched and played around the fire and PIL got home. I did not come in right away to the house because I don't want to leave outside with the fire. Anyway, after the fire die down I came in made a comment to my FIL that I didn't even knew they left until I asked the children. He said, they had to live in the hurry, and I didn't think any of it.

Then DH came home and asked his mother how she is doing and she told the story. Yea, for having Alzheimer she remember about it. I told DH I didn't even know about it. Anyway, I think she have a selective Alzheimer...lol. She want to remember what she like and those bad and not important to her she like to forget...:)).

That is not important. I just like to make fun of her and DH agree with me. I also mention to DH to watch the way she eats. She stuff her mouth with food and tried swallowing everything she have in it. I think that is why she almost choke. Plus, she never drink anything but coffee. If there is not coffee she tried to swallow everything without drinking. DH also mention that if she was choking, he doesn't think she was able to speak and told his father to drive to the emergency room. And just the way she is, she rather pay thousands to the people of the emergency room to give water, rather than ask....yes, ASK people in my house for water for free. She probably shove so much food in and the food kinda stuck in her esophagus. And being old, she thinks she is choking. Good thing she did not blame her husband or the man with her (the way she puts it) for doing it to her. She would come up with many excuses just like the way she is with the remote control. I didn't do it (when she goes up too high with the channels and getting no pictures), however she is the only one holding the remote. I know, patience and take the remote from her and change the channel myself. Well, at least I have something to write, right? hahahaha.

Happy Monday everyone. Time to go out and take my 11 yo DS to his speech lesson.   

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Saturday, November 10, 2012

As the Conversation Goes

While sitting on our dining table eating breakfast together (DH & I), I cannot help myself to make a comment about my FIL. I told DH that we better not sit in front of each other like his parents when we get old. Then he said, yup, waiting for the grimm reaper. I told him that maybe he should build me a tiny green house out back before we get old. His answer was, I will also build a pit stop between our house and the green house to have coffee before continuing.

I almost choke myself laughing, because I told him that his parents was alwasy out of breath walking from our drive way to the house. Now his idea of putting a pit stop between the house and the green house is very funny. Maybe he should build one for his parents between the driveway and the front door...hahahahaha...

I better not...we better not get old that way. It is very sad to look at. My parents at mid 70's or early 80's, and they can out walk both DH and I. They are still very active, and they both know their bodies limitations. They cannot left anything heavy, and tried not to climb anything. I still wish I can still see them before they get weak and pass on. The last time I saw them was 2006 or 2007.

I think even going up and down on my stairs will help me stay healthy. If I do it for 30 minutes once a day. Stepping on fast phase then I can jog it too. We have 12 steps not counting 3 sets of stoops. One on the very top, one at the middle and one at the very bottom. I think it would be a great help for my breathing.

How about you? How do you see yourself in the future?

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Sunday, November 4, 2012

DH Family Staying with Us

Well, only my PIL because they are old and always take forever before the electric people get to their street. DH nephew only comes when his not working or sleeping...lol. DH kept on hinting about his parents, and I kept on telling him they can move in anytime they want. Besides they hardly eat and our children loves them.

MIL is developing Alzheimer pretty fast, and when they got to our house on Thursday (yes, they stayed on their house for two days without electricity because MIL don't want to leave) they are both look very tired and she was disoriented. After resting a bit on a chair, FIL went back outside to his car to start bringing their stuff in...e.i. blankets, pillows, clothes. MIL came to me in the kitchen ( i was cooking "bibingka" (a filipino delicacy) and ask me, "where is Jr, and who is this man with me." I told her Jr. is getting stuff outside and he will be right back. That the man with her is Jr.

She hugged me saying, "oh thank goodness, I thought I am with two man." And started crying. Then the whole time they were awake, she didn't recognize Jr, as the one who drove her in our house. She kept on referring to my FIL as my friend. She also refer to someone who bought her food, and she thinks he is very nice to do so. In her mind she is dealing with at least four men.

On the next day, she kept on bothering FIL if they go home. FIL only ignore her because most of what she was saying does not make any sense. Finally, after the second day, she was much easier to talk to. She can remember almost everything that is going on, except she doesn't ask about going home anymore. Which is good in my opinion. Her Alzheimer focus on her own house, and she only know our house now.

I think they should move in with us permanently. It did a lot of good for her and FIL does not look very tired and irritated. Plus, we have the space for them because DS's like to sleep in the same bedroom. They have a bunk bed and all three sleeps in the same bed...too funny. BTW, she was diagnose with a few months to live. So, at least my FIL will not be alone dealing with her.     

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Mrs. Cheers, Keystone USA

"I'm a Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations. I have a continuing program of research (What mother doesn't?) in the laboratory and in the field (normally I would have said indoors and out). I'm working for my Masters, (the whole darned family) and already have five credits (four sons & one daughter, 1 joined the working community, 4 are being educated @ home ). Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities (any mother care to disagree?), and I often work 14 hours a day (24 is more like it). But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers, and the rewards are more of a satisfaction than just money."


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